SO…a couple of weeks ago I watched a presentation given by an organization of professional stylists I belong to, and to be honest, I was a little horrified (you can see my initial reaction here).
In it, the "image consultant" giving the presentation was explaining some of her tricks for creating optical illusions to conceal "flaws" with clothing.
What really irked me was the way she was just matter-of-factly stating all the things that were wrong with all the women's bodies in the images she used.
Spoiler alert - there was absolutely nothing wrong with these women or their bodies.
I was curious whether I was the only stylist who was struck by this, so I posted this in the organization’s Facebook group:
“Can we start a conversation about what our responsibility is as personal stylists in regards to women's body image? Can we start to acknowledge that women’s bodies are not inherently flawed, and not something to be hidden or "concealed"? Can we acknowledge that when we try to make sure women look as small as possible, we are in fact saying that anyone with a larger body is less worthy? Can we even go far as to say perhaps one’s functional or aesthetic preferences might take higher priority over what is "flattering" to them?
I’d love to hear your reactions to these questions. I know that all of us are in this business to help women feel better about themselves, but sometimes it seems as though some of the methods are reinforcing a very narrow ideal of beauty.
This is a conversation with a lot of nuance, and it doesn't mean that all efforts to make a woman feel good in her clothes are negative. I just think there are other ways to approach it. I welcome your thoughts.”
Ultimately, my post was intended to ask if we can re-envision styling as something other than making women appear thinner. After a weekend of dramatic and purposely misunderstood Facebook conversation, the answer among most of the stylists who weighed in (no pun intended) was no. No, we can’t. All women want is to appear thinner, and that’s what we’re going to give them.
I was pretty surprised. I mean, I know I operate in a little body neutral progressive bubble over here, but it was still somewhat shocking to have it reinforced.
So, I wanted to make sure you’re in the right place.
Just to be clear:
I’m not the kind of personal stylist who thinks the point of fashion is to mold yourself into the closest approximation of the ideal standard of beauty.
I understand that many of us may not feel completely accepting of our bodies, but if your top priority is to look thinner, I’m going to ask where you got that message and challenge you to shift your perspective.
I’ll never be another external source telling you what you *should* be wearing by just looking at you. I’ll be the one asking all the questions that guide you to discovering what it is that you actually want to wear.
I don’t see your body as something flawed or to be concealed, but as a worthy being that is allowed to fully inhabit the space you take up.
Cool? Cool.